asker

niaollhoran asked: dennys why would i want to eat nachos for breakfast

dennys:

pls do not even come at me right now with this kind of attitude why wouldn’t you want to eat nachos 24/7 why wouldn’t you want to enjoy your life to the fullest come on “niaoll” be the breakfast change you want to see in the world!

Constantly amazed that Denny’s does tumblr better than any other company or public figure.

humansofnewyork:

"I’m studying intellectual property law.""What interests you about that?""I want to allow artists to use technology to distribute their work while still controlling their rights. I want to protect them from big corporations who co-opt their work and who use high powered legal teams to win lawsuits based on technicalities. And it pays well."

"I want to protect them from big corporations"
"it pays well."
This girl is in for a rude awakening.

humansofnewyork:

"I’m studying intellectual property law."
"What interests you about that?"
"I want to allow artists to use technology to distribute their work while still controlling their rights. I want to protect them from big corporations who co-opt their work and who use high powered legal teams to win lawsuits based on technicalities. And it pays well."

"I want to protect them from big corporations"

"it pays well."

This girl is in for a rude awakening.

Look, you’re a feminist who, in this particular case, made the non-feminist choice. That’s all. I assume it was the right choice for you, or you wouldn’t have done it, and that’s fine! But feminism is not, in fact, all about choosing your choice. It is mostly about recognizing when things are fucked up for women at the societal level, and talking about that, and trying to change it. So sometimes, even when a decision is right for you, you still need to recognize that you made that decision within a social context that overwhelmingly supports your choice, and punishes women who make a different one. Why I Lose My Mind Every Time We Have the Name Conversation | Kate Harding (via brute-reason)

(via stfu-moffat)

Heirarchy of Television

  1. Shows with musical episodes
  2. Shows that you’re kinda surprised don’t have musical episodes (yet)
  3. Shows that could have musical episodes
  4. Shows that could have musical episodes but it would be kind of weird
  5. Shows that would actively be made worse if they had musical episodes because it would ruin the dramatic tension or whatever

laughingsquid:

Compilation Video of the Best Local News Bloopers from 2013

Okay, but look at how the female reporters react to people fucking with them versus the male reporters. The male reporters will move away or in some cases physically shove people away when they get too close. The female reporters are either ignoring them or responding politely even when the ones assaulting them are animals (not that I advocate shoving baboons, that will end badly).

If you want to see how women and men are socialized differently, this is it, right here.

schizometrics:

tswift beheading john mayer (caravaggio, 1916)

"you should’ve known"

schizometrics:

tswift beheading john mayer (caravaggio, 1916)

"you should’ve known"

effington:

What the hell is going on in Wisconsin

effington:

What the hell is going on in Wisconsin

(via blackpooled)

markdoesstuff:

norttron:

asfadedasmyjeans:

badengagementphotos:

Ah, what a futile attempt at being creative. Seems everyone else had the same stupid idea. Also, if you must do this, at least get signs with better typography.

I really, really loathe this sign.

Ugh

They’d been seeing each other for a few months, but it felt like he’d known her all his life. John had never believed in soul mates before, but everything just felt so right with Kate, that he was beginning to think she might be the One. Late one night, as he kissed her goodnight on her doorstop, she put a hand against his chest, looked him in the eye, and said “You’ve stolen my heart.”

"Aw babe, that’s so sweet," he said. "I feel the exact same - "

She cut him off. “No,” she said harshly. Her gaze was cold and steady, and her fingernails were digging into his chest. “You’ve taken something that is precious to me, something that can never be returned. And I will have my revenge.” She flew straight up into the air, turned into a monstrous dragon, and disappeared into the night sky.

He woke up in a cold sweat. It had only been a dream. Or had it? Something didn’t feel quite right, but he couldn’t figure it out. He showered and dressed for work, at the law office that bore his name. Only when he arrived, his name wasn’t there. “Hey Nancy, what happened to the sign?” he asked his receptionist.
"I’m sorry, who are you?" she said.
"Funny joke. I’m John!" he said.
"John who?" she said.
"What do you mean John who? I’m John…"

He couldn’t for the life of him remember his last name.

"Uh, I’m not feeling too well today,"  he told Nancy. "I’m taking the day off."

She just looked at him oddly as he walked out the door.

Outside the building, he took a few shallow, panicked breaths. He took out his driver’s license and looked at the name on it.

All it said was “John.” There was no last name at all.

He decided to call his father.

"Dad, something weird is happening," he said when his father picked up.
"Who is this?" his father said.
"It’s John, dad."
"John who?"
"I’m your son! I have the same last name as you do!" John was almost in tears.
"I have no son," the old man said in a hollow voice. "I have no last name. And neither do you. You shall have no sons or daughters to carry on your name. Your name and deeds are blotted from the books of history, forever."

The phone clicked.

OH MY GOD IT GOT SO GOOD

(via hellotailor)