Like, “This tea doesn’t taste like English Breakfast, but it thinks it does!”

Or, “This tea is kind of like a cross between English Breakfast and French Breakfast, with the worst qualities of both.”

Or, “This tea is large and cold and loves curling.”

Maybe I just had two Canada jokes to make.

Unfortunately, the tea itself thwarted my plans by not falling under the scope of those two jokes. Although, really, the weakness lies with me, because there certainly are similarities to English Breakfast (as you might expect from a breakfast tea) and I should really be able to make a joke out of them. And, since I generally don’t like breakfast teas all that much, my ability to write an objective review (a phrase which I am declaring a non sequitur) will be put to the test.

The tea itself seems pretty high quality. I hesitate to call the taste “oaky”, because that’s what the website said about it, but really I think that just speaks well for the website because there’s no other term that fits. For someone who likes breakfast teas, it would probably be pretty good.

A solid but not exceptional three stars, because that person is not me.